My Testimony

I’ve grown up in a Christian household my whole life; going to church from the earliest I can remember, talking about Jesus, nightly prayers, etc. It gave me a very solid foundation for not only my faith, but life in general. I attended many kids’ church camps when I was younger, the most memorable being when I was 8 years old. This is where I had my first encounter with Holy Spirit. I felt His presence and gave my life to the Lord that night. When I returned home, I insisted on being baptized as quickly as possible, so later that year, that is what I did. That is when my faith started to grow rapidly. I became more attentive and intentional in listening to sermons, really worshiping, and listening for God’s voice.

Fast forward to 12 years old, football is my everything. I practice and watch film every single day. One day, in the first half of our game I am running down the sideline and the defender dives at my ankles. I feel it pop and am instantly in immense pain…but I am not a quitter. I played the rest of the game thinking it was just a sprain. After the game my mom forced me to go to urgent care and that’s exactly what they said it was. Over the next week and a half nothing got better, I could still barely walk. Then came a trip to the hospital; the doctors once again misdiagnosed me, causing my recovery to be pushed back again. Eventually, I ended up on crutches for 9 months. Doing painful physical therapy through it all. These were the hardest months of my entire life. I became extremely depressed and anxious, having panic attacks daily. I lost motivation to do anything, thinking that my life was pointless. I hated every second. I’d never enjoyed school, the injury just made it worse. I had no attention span or care. Luckily, I was smart enough to maintain “A”s and make everybody think I was okay. I hated time at home because it reminded me that I couldn’t do anything fun anymore. I also was constantly being asked questions by my parents which I became very irritated with. I became very good at wearing a mask. On the outside I told everybody I was okay, but on the inside I wanted nothing to do with life.

Eventually I was put on medication once my depression became too bad to hide behind my mask. Once the edge was taken off, I was able to think somewhat clearly. I realized that God had taken away the thing I loved most because I had replaced Him with it. My identity was in football, not my relationship with God. The journey after the injury lasted over a year, and through the entire thing I had finally realized that my worth wasn’t in my performance or ability in sports, but in my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. After I realized this, my life flipped around. Although I still struggle from time to time with a bit of anxiety or sadness, God has changed me. My faith grew exponentially after this, I had finally reignited the fire that little 8-year-old me had once had. I became much more involved and plugged in at church. Singing and playing piano for worship team, helping in kids ministry, etc. I had a solid church family around me that I am forever grateful for.

Jump to 2022…I get covid for the 3rd time. But this time after I’m healed I don’t feel the same. I noticed I’m getting out of breath easily, and my heart is racing. Then a couple weeks later I noticed that my hands were shaking uncontrollably. They shook in school while using a pencil, anytime I ate (using a spoon was a struggle), and anytime I even just held my hands up. I also lost grip strength and started dropping things often, even if they didn’t weigh a lot. Then, I started getting very light-headed and even passed out in my garage once after getting out of the car. I was playing football through this and blacking out on-and-off in games. So of course, I spent more time at the doctor’s office getting more tests. Eventually they diagnosed me with POTS (Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome). They told me it was a post-covid syndrome that has been common in teenage boys who had experienced covid. This means that when I changed levels at all, my blood pressure dropped significantly enough to make me light-headed. My heart couldn’t pump blood to my brain quick enough to stop this from happening. So of course, I couldn’t play football for the rest of the season, couldn’t run track, and couldn’t do much else either. Which for the first time in my life, didn’t seem to bother me much. I had already lost my love of football and wasn’t planning on playing after that season anyway. But most of all, I was content in knowing that my life didn’t depend on these things. I had comfort in knowing I was in the Lord’s hands.

These symptoms continued until around April, 2024. I was at my youth group on a Wednesday night and during worship I sat down and started praying. I wasn’t praying for healing, but more clarity in what to do with my future. I had mentioned missions to my parents and I wanted to pursue it, but they were skeptical because of my age. However, that night my parents came over to me while I was sitting there and told me that God was telling them to let me go, that I was in His hands. All of the sudden I felt a rush of chills, and lost all control of my body. I was completely relaxed, which was amazing because I don’t remember the last time I wasn’t stressed out or up-tight. I was so filled with the Holy Spirit and His peace and it was the greatest feeling ever. That night God gave me clarity to pursue missions fully, as well as the most comfort and peace I’d ever felt. He took every burden and heavy thought off of my mind and heart, I was so grateful. A couple of days passed and I realized that I hadn’t been light-headed at all. A few more days passed, and a few more…I still hadn’t felt light-headed a single time. I had been healed! I always knew that God had the power to heal, but I never thought I would experience a healing before I saw one in person. A few days later in church I felt the same presence as that one Wednesday night. I instantly held my hands up and as I stared at them, they were completely still. My mom looked over and started crying; within the span of a week or so, God had healed my heart and my tremor.

Throughout my life I’ve experienced lots of heartache, trails, and tribulations; but I’ve also been blessed with an amazing family and support system to help me through it all. Most of all, I thank the Lord for every single breath in my lungs. I truly don’t know if I would even be alive today if I didn’t have Him.

With that being said, I’m so so so excited for this next chapter in my life on the World Race Study Abroad! I’m excited to meet my team, meet new people, minister to others, pray for others, have a new experience every day, and see new places every day! I’m looking forward to leaning into God more than ever, depending on him every day, and doing that in a way that shows others the true power of the Lord.